There is one thing I have learned this past year. Do not hide your truth. My brother and sister-in-law (who I once considered my closest), invited my ex-husband to stay with them. For me, this is a line that should never be crossed no matter what the family dynamic is. This man was abusive to me and my children as well as another ex-wife and her children. I have come to understand today that I was only used in his charade to hurt his first wife. I am okay with this because I have the letters that she gave me; the ones that he wrote to her when he was with him. While I provided a home and love to him. You see, I know all of his dirty deeds, the lies he told, and the pain that he caused. I am the one cast as the loser, my sins held against me, and even stories about sins I never committed. I would protect this man and thought that his former family was telling me lies about him. I protected him with all of my being.
Let me tell one story of his "truth" and the pain that he caused a child of his own. I received a call from his ex-wife. We had a home with acreage. Ex-husband had gone to the feed store with his two children from a former marriage. They needed muck boots to be outside. Once inside the feed store, he had his children change out of their shoes and wear new muck boots out of the feed store without paying from them. The little girl had nightmares after that because her family had taught her about honesty. I never knew about this until some years after but it made my heart ache because supposedly I was the one that has been doing "evil" deeds and caused the demise to my family.
Denial is an enormously powerful defense for a wife and a parent who cannot acknowledge that we have an abuser in our homes. We permit the abuser to rein unchallenged in their household. I defended and supported the abuser in every way; financially, emotionally, psychologically, while doing little to protect my children. I made up stories to make him seem wonderful, caring, and good. Of course, I started doubting my own memories, perceptions, and judgments. I suspect that I was the "crazy one". Of course, it was my ex-husband who was actually in charge.
How many women hide truth and how many people believe the worse in them. Message me with your story!
This is my official blog. My other site by this same name was pirated by a woman named #AnnetteKaye Bedwell, #AnnetteKayeCasady, #AnnetteKayeReynolds, #AnnetteKayeKruse, #MistyDawn, #RedBedwell (she is known many alias' and is in possession and uses all personal information owned by me).
To date, she has refused to return my site and blog back to me.
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