People say things and make promises they have no intention of keeping on a daily basis. You can tell someone you love him or her as many times as you want, but until your behavior coincides with that, the other person will probably not believe you. Some feelings cannot be expressed in mere words; they require actions to speak for them. Words are cheap, anyone can tell someone they love them, but they will not feel the immensity of these emotions until they are acted upon.
I have learned this with family. LOVE is a flippant word; to be stated when one has no intention of following through. The way people conduct themselves in different situations is a greater determinant of behavior and character than the words through which they choose to express themselves. What you do holds much more significance than what you say. Know your values.
When you're not clear what your values are, you're at risk of becoming a helpless passenger rather than a confident driver of own life. You'll be at risk of jumping on board with other people's ideas and may be easily led astray. Take back your power by acknowledging your values and living true to what's important to you. Don't say what you don't mean. I have spent years trying to make other people feel good that I wasn't making me feel good. For years and years and years, just to find LOVE and validation from others; that I belonged in their circle. I did not and I will never fit. I am okay with that! It is unfortunate that we have to be uncomfortable trying to make others comfortable.
Once I had a woman in my life that I loved more than life. She is beautiful, talented, seemingly "perfect" person. She appears to have many friends. She is socially accepted. She seemed to be everything that I wasn't. I learned that she wasn't. She shared things behind my back that were not true and they were hurtful. Of course, I was in denial that she was even doing it and then one day, truth revealed itself. Actions revealed themselves. I learned the hard way about human nature; about what family truly isn't. I learned what LOVE is really not. Don't read into this because I still love her with all my heart, I have forgiven her, but I haven't forgotten how she made me feel. Less than, not capable of being, not enough! And I am okay with that!
Today, my life is filled with my own family; college, art, writing, and music. It is all that I need and it is becoming my super-power. I have risen from the ashes from which others fueled the fire and watched me burn, seeds and all. And I am okay with that!
This is my official blog. My other site by this same name was pirated by a woman named #AnnetteKaye Bedwell, #AnnetteKayeCasady, #AnnetteKayeReynolds, #AnnetteKayeKruse, #MistyDawn, #RedBedwell (she is known many alias' and is in possession and uses all personal information owned by me).
To date, she has refused to return my site and blog back to me.
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